Sea To Sea Big Mouth
by focusly
Summary: Spiff of the famous Dick Van Dyke ep. My first RB fic, written at 5 am this morning. please r/r !


(Opening theme song comes on as Bob walks through door

(Opening theme song comes on as Bob walks through door. He walks over and attempts to kiss Dot, but she points out that they have guests. He walks into the living room and trips, no, flips over the ottoman. The guests help him up and shake his hand)

**Sea to Sea Big Mouth**

(Open on a small game show set during commercial time)

AndrAIa: Gee, Dot, I'm so excited. What if I get called on?

Dot: Oh, we won't get called on. See they only call up the pretty, vulnerable women.

AndrAIa: Oh, I suppose you're right. (Pause) Oh, if I got called on, I'd just nullify, Dot, I'd just nullify. 

(Dot rolls eyes as host announces the end of the commercial break)

Host: Welcome back to the show! As you can see, we only have time for one more round.

(Assistant wheels in big bowl of names and host sticks his hand in it)

…and the contestant for this round will be..(Pulls out name) AndrAIa!

(AndrAIa is frozen to the spot and unable to move)

Host: Is there an AndrAIa here?

Dot: AndrAIa! (Shoves her) get up there!

(Host notices Dot) hey young, lady, since your friend is currently unable to go, would you like to go for her?

(Dot looks at Dre) uhh….sure!

(Dot is greeted by host as she walks up to the stage)

Host: What's your name, little lady?

Dot: Dot. Dot Matrix.

Host: Matrix…. Why does that name sound familiar? Do you have a husband?

Dot: Yea, Bob. He's a respected guardian, you know, works for Turbo.

Host: Turbo! The old chap, haven't seen him since the whole Daemon ordeal. So tell me Dot, of all the times you and Bob have been over at his house, have you ever, you know, seen his toupee collection?

Dot: Oh know, he doesn't show it to anyone, not even Bob.

Host, shocked: YOU MEAN THAT TURBO IS BALD???

(Dot gets horrified after realizing what she just said)

Host: Well ladies and gentlemen, straight from the woman's mouth, Turbo is BALD. The man we've come to know and love is BALD.

Dot: No! I didn't mean that! I…I….

Host: so let's get on with the show, shall we? (Leads shocked Dot to the first round game)

(Later, at the Matrix house. Dot and AndrAIa are in the kitchen)

Dot: Oh, AndrAIa, I don't know what I'm going to do.

AndrAIa: well, at least you won a rotisserie.

(Dot looks at AndrAIa, exasperated)

AndrAIa: what?

(Sound of front door opening and closing)

AndrAIa: uh oh. As much as I would love to see this, this is my cue to get out of here.

(She exits the back door)

(Bob walks in and kisses Dot)

Bob: So, how was the game show?

Dot: Oh, it was ok.

Bob : Yea, we watched you in Turbo's office.

Dot: You did?!

Bob: Yea, we saw you get called up, but we had to leave then because it was lunch break. So, did you win anything?

Dot: Yea, a rotisserie and a home vid-show player.

Bob: That's great! (Notices she's about to cry and approaches her) What's wrong?

Dot: Bob…I...said that Turbo was bald in front of everybody!

Bob: Aww, it's ok, …you WHAT?!

Dot, in tears: I didn't mean to! The host tricked me!

Bob: What do you mean the host tricked you? Aw man, what will I say when I have to face him tonight? This is going to cost me my job!

Dot: I'm sorry! I'll apologize! I just –

Bob: shh, it's ok, I'll get this straightened out…somehow…I'll talk to Mouse and Matrix, ok? They'll know what to do..

(In the Super Computer, at Bob's office)

Mouse: You're screwed.

Bob: What do you mean I'm screwed? It wasn't even my fault! 

Matrix: Well bud, I don't know what to tell you.

Bob, with head in hands: Oh, what am I going to do? What am I going to do?

Mouse: I'm sure he won't even know what happened – 

Matrix: - yea, despite the fact that millions of people watched it.

(Mouse glares at Matrix)

Mouse: Look, if he calls you in, then just keep your head up and tell him the truth.

Matrix: If not, I'm sure a lot of companies would be willing to hire you, especially since they're all owned by Dot.

Bob, sarcastically: Thanks.

(Secretary walks in)

Sec: Sir, I know it's none of my business, sir, but I saw your wife walk past a nano ago. It looks like she was heading towards the elevator, sir. 

Bob: she must be going to Turbo's office! Oh man, I gotta stop her!

(Bob rushes out)

Matrix: Maybe he'll be able to find work with Phong.

(Mouse decks him)

(Dot knocks on Turbo's door)

Turbo: come in.

(Dot enters and Turbo looks up from paperwork)

Turbo: Oh, it's little miss loud mouth.

(Dot looks at Turbo's plastic heads lined around his desk and is at a loss for words)

Turbo: So, you ruin my reputation on national television and now you come back for more, huh. 

Dot: No! I..I came to say I was sorry.

Turbo, to his heads: you hear that boys, she says she's sorry. 

Dot: I didn't mean it!

Turbo: of course you didn't. Now, tell me one thing Miss Matrix. Now that everybody knows my little "secret", what am I supposed to do with these? (Holds up one of his toupees)

Dot: …there must be some needy bald people.

(Bob rushes in) Dot! Are you ok?

Dot: Yea. So, Turbo (swallows), do you forgive me?

Turbo, exasperated: yea yea yea now gets out.

Dot: Good, at least I didn't tell them about your nose job! Er, I mean..

(Bob rushes her out before Turbo does something drastic)

FIN

Big thanks to Starlet for reviewing it

Disclaimer : insert standard disclaimer here


End file.
